Chancellor Joel Klein can save much money in the city's education budget by following the wonderful example of President Bush.

He could stop all this namby-pamby nonsense that advises our school children to talk out their problems instead of solving them with guns. He could stop this un-American baloney about trying to work out problems through talking, even if that process actually works. He could throw out all this conflict-resolution guff and save a ton of scarce dollars.

Klein could invoke the words of the President and tell the city's million students that the only thing that matters is power. The biggest guy rules. The gang is the primary social unit. The bigger the gang, the bigger the say about imposing your will on others. The world is simple, Klein could say, not in the least complicated. And the basic rule is that you hit the other guy before he hits you. We adults call this "preemption."

Perhaps our hardworking teachers could take the new American message to the classrooms before the chancellor bows to the new American reality. They could examine the current dispute with the United Nations about sending weapons inspectors to Iraq. The President, as we all know, doesn't want to hear any arguments. In effect, he is telling the UN: "It's my way or the highway." He wants the UN to do what the Bush administration tells it to do, and if they refuse, then we can destroy the UN. Take our money away and our power, and start killing as we see fit to make this a more peaceful, democratic world.

After all, talk is just talk. Why listen to diplomats who've read too many books and even, on occasion, have studied history? Books don't matter. Only deeds matter. When you're dealing with a Ruthless Dictator Who Gassed His Own People, the most effective deed of all is dropping a daisy cutter on him from 35,000 feet. Don't let him crawfish you.

Too much talking

The teachers could explain to their young charges that American grownups can endure the talking thing at the UN, but only for a few days, and with full knowledge that whatever is said, only power matters. If "we" decide that waiting is not in our interest, then we must act, no matter what anyone else says.

"You're either with us or against us," the teachers could tell the young, explaining the cardinal rule of modern life. Indifference is not allowed. And — horrors — skepticism must be totally eliminated. Life — this must be repeated over and over — is not complicated. It is black and white, without shades of gray. "We" are good. "They" are bad. The good must vanquish the bad, at all times, and in all places. It is our mission. The orders come from God, directly to the President.

Of course, there would have to be some other adjustments to the core curriculum. The science courses, for example, would have to be altered. For centuries, we've been taught that evidence matters. You can't say the world is flat without presenting evidence. You can't say cholera is a disease caused by filth without presenting evidence.

Under the new rules of American life, evidence doesn't matter. If our leaders believe that Saddam Hussein has various weapons of mass destruction hidden in the basements of various presidential palaces, then we are instructed to agree. There's no need for photographs, bills of lading, hard documents. Suspicion is enough. Why waste precious time with weapons inspections or the search for evidence? Bomb, invade, bulldoze and find the evidence. If we then find no evidence, the world can sleep more peacefully. "Golly," the defense secretary can say, as the Iraqis bury their dead. "What a dickens of a mission!"

Shoot it out

Meanwhile, as the school year lengthens and students following the example of their elders go back to the old ways of settling all disputes with Glocks, we can celebrate each funeral with American flags. No more talk. No more complexity.

At the same time, New York students can follow the events after the war, as American taxpayers come up with $200 billion to turn Iraq into a kind of Middle Eastern Minnesota. Our own school houses might be rotting, but no matter. Great brave Americans such as Dick Cheney, Paul Wolfowitz and Richard Perle can explain democracy to Iraqi Shiites, Sunni and Kurds. As just one example of the moral power of democracy, they can cite the 2000 election. In our glorious system, the man with the most votes sometimes loses. God is good.

You hope, of course, that the adults of the world will prevail, that talk will head off slaughter. Talk is irritating. It is tedious. It is often choked with lies, suspicion, irrational subjectivity. But it is not shooting.

The UN is a place for talking. The UN weapons inspectors should depart as soon as possible for Iraq, holding the Baghdad regime to its word. They should try to find the evidence that the U.S. has not yet produced. If they do find chemical, biological or nuclear weapons, then, under UN directions, those weapons must be destroyed. If their searches are thwarted by the Iraqis, then force can follow.

But for now, the grownups must set an example for the young. Not simply here at home, but everywhere in the world. It's better to make the attempt at conciliation before resorting to the gun. In our classrooms for the past 10 years, we've been teaching the young to talk, to argue, but never to pick up a gun with the intention of using it. In New York, that counsel has worked. School shootings are way down, and graduations are up. That example should not be thrown away in the obsessions of the moment.